Magic child

I was standing alone
in the doorway of hope
we’d been fighting so hard
to come see it all along

 

The beautiful times
of all the preparation
the wonderful magic
during the expectation

 

You made me happy and trusting
in the whole new future
my life was reconstructed
and I became so sure

 

That the only thing can happen
is joyous and amazing
that everything will turn
into forever winning

 

I was right, I know I was right
the best moments of being alive

 

All of a sudden the time became frozen
I still remember the heartbeats were broken
I started to lose everything in front of my eyes
Just like in a movie, I’m seeing everything in daylight

 

The tiles were reflecting the fading sunshine
the abandoned corridor echoed my (shivering) cry
as I was trying to pray and asking our God
to take me instead and give you the life

 

The longest prayer I had at a fragmented hour
I was unable to talk but my screams were loud
and there wasn’t any answer
just a reel of my past

 

Before you came to alive
to see this world
before you came to bless
and change this world
I pledged to our Father
who lives in the skies
trading my old self
for giving you new life

 

God has saved you
you are a miracle child
there wasn’t any chance
yet you’re here, alive

 

Everyday I leave you
to help this world
I’m doing ’cause I’ve promised
always to do better

 

I’ll never want to have
a relaxing night
until Heaven on Earth
is not realized

 

God didn’t take my life
to trade it for yours
I offered my wrongs
and I became better for good

 

It is still hard to breathe
when I recall those moments
My heart is aching
I’m paralysed by the what ifs

 

I love you my son
And I would do it again
to have you be born
and let you be

 

You are a magic child
The best ever could happen
This world is more complete
and Blessed by your presence

 

Before you came to alive
to see this world
before you came to bless
and change this world
I pledged to our Father
who lives in the skies
trading my old self
for giving you the life

 

 

Joshua Dragon

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Have you ever been broken?

Have you ever been broken
Have you ever felt the fear
Have you ever become lonely
in a sudden, unexpected way

Have you ever been shaken
Have you ever felt betrayed
Have you ever become bitter
in a sudden, unexpected way

Have you ever been non-existent
Have you ever felt worthless
Have you ever become a silent scream
in a sudden, unexpected way

Have you ever been lost
Have you ever felt mislead
Have you ever become a runaway
in a sudden, unexpected way

I wish I had the strength
to pray

 

Joshua Dragon

Let Us Become People Who Can Live with God’s Love

Do you know a place where God is nearest to you? That is the place of repentance. However, as you understand God more, you don’t need to say to Him, “Please forgive me because I committed such and such sins.” Once you repent the fact that you did not know God’s Heart looking over you, everything will be forgiven.

If there is a greater sinner than a prodigal son who wastes all the money of his parents, this is a son who hurts and wounds his parents’ loving hearts. There is no greater sin. If this son cries out while saying, “How can my sin that injured my father’s heart be forgiven?”, then the father will forgive him by saying, “Oh, my son and Oh, my son.” If the fallen parents can do this, God will definitely forgive you.

In general people go to their church and pray, “Please forgive me for I repent for such a such a sin I committed.” However, you rather pray like this, “I dishonoured the principle of Heavenly ethic, trampled the sacred relationship between God and human being and violated the relationship between Human and all things of creation. I committed this grave sin that violated all relations of hearts. Please have your way for such a wretched man.” By repenting this way, you may be accepted by Him, and subsequently becoming victorious to be recognized by Heavenly Father, everything will be resolved completely. Heaven definitely visits a person who repents in such way.

Then, what should you do in order to truly repent? First step is for you to set up right direction in your life and put utmost effort to achieve your goals, by repenting daily in your life of faith. God will always listen to the requests from such a person. In fact, since both you and God know what you must do now, ninety percent of your prayer should not asking God about things that you want to do. Rather, 90% of your prayer must be repentance. This is the same as the teaching of Jesus: “Repent, the Kingdom of God is at hand.” Repentance has such important value if it is done correctly.

Your goals are already set very high. So you know the days when you cannot reach the goals. When you come to short of achieving them, you must repent on the day by saying, “God, I am sorry for not achieving the goals today. I really wanted to come closer to reaching the goals, but I fail to do it. Please forgive me. Then, I will determine to fulfil them tomorrow.” This is your prayer method…

However, you may need to repent the next day. When you set high goals, you cannot reach them easily, thus, everyday is a day of repentance. But, it is beautiful thing to behold. Each day is a new day and a new beginning. In your journey of life, each and every day is a day of repentance. Such a way of living is so wonderful. This is far better than your proud feeling such as saying “I am a leader. So, I give orders to all people around me.” Thus, life of repentance is much more wonderful.

God never be so proud to say, “Because I am the Almighty God, you people must obey what I say.” Then, how can you so proud to say that you are great, as you are trying to comfort and console God whose heart is filled with sorrow? You have never reached such a position to be proud of yourselves. If you repent daily, even though you don’t realize these points, you are growing. (…)

I want you to realize that even though you repent throughout your life, you have never equated your debts. In the path of repentance, each day is a new start. This path is truly your own path of cross. On this path, you only ascend, never descend. Jesus went to mountain alone countless times in order to be away from others, to fast, and to pray with so many tears. Even for Jesus, each and every day was a new beginning of repentance. This is only certain way where you are guaranteed to grow and never stumble.

Let Us Become People Who Can Live with God’s Love
Reverend Sun Myung Moon
May 8, 1960

The course of repentance

A true religion teaches the necessity of repentance but how many of you know how to repent so far? Repentance must be an act of tears, not for yourself, but for humanity and for the aching heart of God. Have you experienced that kind of repentance? A repentant heart can say, ‘ ‘Now I realize what a poor and miserable son I have been. I have pierced Your heart over and over, never even realizing that You existed’ my Father. I have broken Your heart and now I come to You and need Your forgiveness.” This is the first repentance.

How do you know that your repentance can be accepted by God? You can see proof in your own resurrection. When your heart has grown in such a way that you totally put yourself on the side of God and in looking at the world shed tears, you know that your tears are no longer for your selfish purpose. Then you know your heart is with God.

Regardless where the heart of God moves, no power under the sun can deter it. It moves straight forward, all the way to the end. As the father, God is ceaselessly going after His own children but He will never tire. When you put yourself totally on the side of God you are like a parent trying to save your dying children. How can you as a parent get tired or bored? You cannot help but go straight after hue inanity, until every soul here on earth is saved. If you feel as their parent, there is no way you can get tired. Our road may be getting tougher and tougher and our tears may come more frequently, but does that mean that we are retreating or giving up the mission? No, that will spur us on even further.

First of all, have you ever cried out before Heaven and Earth, “God, I have been a sinner, I have been the worst kind of criminal in Your sight. Please forgive me”? Have you shed such tears yet? Have you said to God’ “I have no more personal ambition. I only ask for Your mercy upon me”? Have you ever totally given yourself to do God’s will, feeling that if you receive God’s mercy there is nothing you cannot do? This is the first step, the freshman course.

In many cases people look for a convenient God who will smilingly accept everything they are already attached to. Such people want God to come in a very narrow gate. How about you, right now, in your own heart? Have you ever thought about yourself as the worst kind of sinner, who would give up anything to receive God’s mercy and forgiveness? Have you experienced that? By sincerely feeling that repentance, you can liquidate your entire fallen past and disengage yourself from the consequences of the fall.

From your individual tears and misery you can make a gigantic leap from one world to the other, from the human level of tears to the level of God’s tears. You can do this because you can disengage yourself from the iniquity of the past, freeing yourself from all the attachments behind you.

That point is critically important. You have been crying your own tears, but at this point of repentance you can meet the tears of God and be embraced by the merciful, loving God. You are then experiencing the grief and agony of Adam and Eve, but at the same time you are experiencing the suffering heart of God. The two start at one point. You must pass through that experience. Unless you pass through that realm, you will never understand the love of God, no matter what.

Words alone are empty. What you need is to shed so many tears that your eyes swell shut and you cannot bear to open them in the sunlight. We need men who are able to shed the tears of God. Nothing can happen with dry eyes. It is in tears that most of the re-creation process takes place. In that atmosphere alone can the re-making of a new man, society, nation, world and new universe take place. That’s why the declaration is made in the Bible, “Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand.” By repentance you can come nearer to the kingdom and to union with God.

The Return to Tears
Reverend Sun Myung Moon
October 16, 1977

I was wondering whether You can accept my love

I was wondering whether You can accept my love, Father,

I was wondering, if I can be enough mature and clean for You,

I was wondering, I should tell You, I’ve been longing,

longing for Your appreciation, Your love and care

which I know I receive each and every moment

yet, I’m so far almost all the time

to be close enough to feel You

I’m so far almost all the time

from You!

 

 

-Joshua Dragon-

I will pray for You

I will pray for You

I will pray

no matter how hard

it is for You

to stay on the long road

to be focused always

I will pray for You

I will pray

even when your path

becomes thorny

to keep trying

to be strong

I will pray for You

I will pray

whenever the loneliness

embraces Your heart

to relieve You

to set You free

I will pray for You

I will pray

nights and days

with my deeds

thoughts and heart

I will pray for You

I will pray

 

 

Joshua Dragon

12 Days with God – Day Nine

Join me for 12 days to spend more time with God, our Heavenly Parent.

This was the ninth day.

“How happy are you who are poor: yours is the kingdom of God. Happy you who are hungry now: you shall be satisfied. Happy you who weep now: you shall laugh.”
Luke 6:21

 

This was the day of change.

I was heading towards to You in this path, again, and I hoped to find the straigthest path, not an elliptic one, again…

…and so the day became days, loosing sense on routines. After a while, days melted into evolving time and space. Memory of Your past echoed in me as I was loosing sight and detoured. You have created time and space, this world of dreams, hopes and possibilities – how could You prevent Yourself from changing, when everything went astray?

I realized, Your determination has always been greater than the pain You have suffered, Your hope is a constant one, Your acts for humankind haven’t ceased despite all the things we have been doing against the Ideal.

This is what I learned from You, that’s what I need to do: improving always, and not changing in doing, ceaselessly love through actions, and hoping Heaven on Earth will be on Earth and Heaven soon.

I must change to be unchanging in love and dedication, just like You, Father.

Thank you for teaching me, Father, even when it hurts.

Your son,

 

-JD-

12 Days with God – Day Eight

Join me for 12 days to spend more time with God, our Heavenly Parent.

This was the eighth day.

The spirit of the Lord has been given to me, for he has anointed me. He has sent me to bring the good news to the poor, to proclaim liberty to captives and to the blind new sight, to set the downtrodden free, to proclaim the Lord’s year of favor!
Luke 4:18-19

 

This was the day of life.

I was looking forward to this day. I was looking forward to feel You, I was looking forward to see You in every meetings, I was looking forward to spot You in the crowd. I was looking forward to get to know what was what You wanted to teach me today.

I was not able to keep the right mindset all the time, I had to warn myself, and I failed to realize in time every so often the sudden challenges are You gifts to receive a greater Blessing. An interrupted little to nothing sleep should have been felt Your care, not a headache, an immature youngster’s action could have been experienced as Your interactive historical tv-channel, I also should have changed my schedule when I was needed by one of the most beloved ones instead of loosing actual priorities.

Besides, I was aware of a teaching You gave me, and I acted upon, giving more from myself, as I used to and I supposed to do. It felt good and another way to improve and grow – for the most beloved ones, and through them the whole world.

I felt lonely.

I don’t know how and why. It might have a similar experience when long time ago Your pain was revealed during the time creating art. I still remember the endless, salt streams, the inner travel beyond time and space and the heart I felt, Your heart, seeing how everything was falling apart…. I felt Your loneliness and eager desire to accomplish and restore everything, becoming content and happy. I wish I could give You this. I would grant You it in an instant. Maybe, one day, soon, You will have the chance to accept it…

What will the next day bring, I can’t know. Either a challenge or tranquility, I’ll invite You for everything, each moments of my life, please, be a  part of my life, Father!

Your son,

 

-JD-

12 Days with God – Day Seven

Join me for 12 days to spend more time with God, our Heavenly Parent.

This is the seventh day.

Again, as one man’s fall brought condemnation on everyone, so the good act of one man brings everyone life and makes them justified. As by one man’s disobedience many were made sinners, so by one man’s obedience many will be made righteous. When law came, it was to multiply the opportunities of falling, but however great the number of sins committed, grace was even greater; and so, just as sin reigned wherever there was death, so grace will reign to bring eternal life thanks to the righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Romans 5:18-21

 

This was the day of promises.

Father, I’ve been thinking of You a lot today, I was wondering how this day will unfold itself, I felt a growing curiosity inside of me, it was a pure, child’s love and interest, and I had completely forgotten how wonderful and uplifting it could feel. Though, it was not a rebirth, some of my cells radiated the light of Your love, from the inside of me. It is so nice to remember, it was today and it wasn’t a dream…

…this day wasn’t a perfect day, although overcoming challenges were mostly successful, I still have this unexplainable understanding in my heart and mind, every cells of my body: in Heaven there aren’t anxiety, annoying events, carelessness, laziness, narrow-mindedness, in Heaven, still I believe it in forever, nobody feels lonely and abandoned, betrayed and neglected, misused and forgotten. If this is the world of reasoning around us, I can’t be a part of it…

…how often I was called as starchild, now, I understand, they all felt and experienced Your love through me… a connection might have taken way longer time to establish…

Father, what is Your attitude towards broken promises?

How can You cope with falsity, enmity, betrayal and blaming? You have never ever done anything wrong, still… How can You trust again?

Night is late, dreams have been cast, I have wanted to serve and be energetic with serving others and being with You. Now, I need to lay my head, my body needs to take a rest, will You join me, Father?

Can You join me, Father, truly and forever?

Your son,

 

-JD-