epitaph

haven’t I given
everything to you
haven’t I changed
completely for you

haven’t I dreamt of
a better future with you
haven’t I fought for
a brighter tomorrow

haven’t I believed
in the unity of us
haven’t I acted
upon each promises

haven’t I felt
your touch as eternity
haven’t I been
reborn by it

those times
are gone now
need to evolve
this is goodbye

 

Joshua Dragon

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Powerlessness

what have I done
if I have done
what have I missed
if I have missed

I wasn’t here
where I should have been
I haven’t seen
what should I have seen

now
suffering comes

they are just innocent
to be harmed this way
what have I done
what I should have seen?

just missed the life
their life
who we miss now and tomorrow

accusing myself
can’t see the pain
doubts in everything
and prayers to God
to forgive what I have
and haven’t done

have no words
even my existence is so heavy
how could I endure it
when others suffer

I feel I can’t bear the pain that others suffer
I wish time to turn back
I wish to change the Rules
I wish myself to suffer and ache instead of them
I wish I was True Father to bear this
I wish I was a True Man to bear it
I wish to resemble Him
who suffers the most because of me
because of me
because of me

and still
He lifts me up
embraces
forgives
and forgets
and Loves

turning my powerlessness into capable capacity
to love them again
the world
and the humanity
including…
…me

 

JD

I haven’t broken my vows. Then why?

What happens when you keep your life aligned with your prayers and promises and yet, something just pushing you down unexpectedly, again?

I do have a feeling, if we added all the prayers, good thoughts and wishes, pledges together, more than two Heavens could be built. Still, it is just not happening.

How so?

Individually, each and every one of us has experienced the overwhelming joy of hope and clarity, wisdom – leading a true life.

And by the same token, each and every one of us has also experienced the overbearing, suffocating, pressing doubts, disappointments, agony, misfortune – times of no hope and giving up.

Is it like we need to be balanced by some mysterious force of nature?

If that was the case, we wouldn’t feel misery and loss, tranquil knowledge would fill us to full extent.

I am a person of my prayers, a man of my words. Though I was needed to be taught I’m not omnipotent to solve everything by myself, I can say, I’m searching the highest possible ways to live up to God’s, our Heavenly Parent’s standard of heart and deeds.

And despite this, grief and sorrow visit me in my everyday life.

Have I done something wrong?

I can always find something in myself to do better, however, it just doesn’t add up. It feels, it can’t be the same weight.

Have you ever had this feeling? I’m sure you have, just like each and every one of us.

The key is the individual responsibility.

We all have it in each situation. Just like the first couple had at the Garden, just like our parents, our children and our siblings.

You can’t actually help somebody if he or she doesn’t want to be helped.

It is that simple.

You only can pretend to be happy if there is one single person left in pain.

Even if we do everything, we do bring it on, we need partners to live and work, to prosper, just like for each inhale we need and exhale.

Just like for each daylight we need the night to stay alive.

Each action requires a subject partner who can make us object partners. And it goes around.

To wait them to recognize this pattern which is everywhere in the Nature is the hardest part.

Doing 100 % is just our part.

Times to grasp and embrace God’s, our Heavenly Parent’s heart.

 

 

Joshua Dragon

All the anger and resentments

As I Can See

Isn’t it strange, when you do your best to love the people closer to you and farther away, and choose to change yourself, surrender your own desires hoping it will bring a brighter day for the world around, suddenly you are trembled upon, torn apart by careless words and others’ selfish deeds, shaking all your beliefs and intentions?

It’s not righteous and you feel it.
It’s destructive, you know it in your bone-marrow.
It’s a poison and you feel you are suffocating.
It’s a trap and you can’t seem to find the end of the maze.

Though emotions should be guided by intellect, it is just the whole situation which makes you powerless. And you come to the point you don’t want to do this any more. You’ve tried your best, your utmost effort, risked everything just for others and the ideal – but the excruciating pain is too much…

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Are People Inherently Bad?

Have you ever thought our world is doomed and people are less likely to manifest eternal happiness and cause joy to each other? You might be right about it…

However, there is an “if” in this case.

First of all, “if” we really look around and see the recent state of our world today we can safely say, there are barely any glimpses of true shine of hope and wisdom.

Can any leaders in any field be trusted to take a lead for the greater good not for own, selfish interests?

Of course, plenty of them are giving donations which is great, some support people in need, children in crisis and so on.

A great yet small sum in exchange for what they did to them, to all of us. Anyhow, we are all into this, together, collectively.

Yes, personally you most probably never harmed anyone, never caused any regional conflict to gain more for your business, possibly never lied bluntly instead of being honest and most probably you never took advantage on the vulnerable ones.

However, we all let it happen. We all let the evil to spread among us, causing misery and agony.

With every day not changing and evolving for the greater, common good, we keep repeating the same, vicious cycle what has been happening since we remember for human history.

And maybe there is where everything lies behind.

We forgot the beginning.

We became purposeless.

We became rootless.

This rootlessness made us to be ruthless. And instead of dreaming for a great future and building it, we keep doing everything against ourselves and each other.

“IF” we look around, if we really look at that, especially the Nature, we can see patterns. Patterns which are unchanging, eternal in every level in the Universe. Even in our own cells. Even in the planetary systems. And they are to show how our own lives are supposed to be.

Living for the sake of others.

It all starts with an internal desire, continues with the right mindset. It goes on with the right way of speaking. And then actions come. First: mind and body unity, centred on a true heart.

A person who is growing this way, can relate in a more mature level with another one. Together, they are able to unite in a much higher and heartfelt relationships. A true one.

It can happen between a parent and a child, siblings and spouses.

As for siblings, this can be applied to anyone, every one of us can relate to each other as true brothers and sisters.

We can even use this kind of approach with the world around us, keeping and growing a sustainable garden of life.

“If” we can see the patterns, maybe it takes time, then, we will be able to start to think of applying them, step by step to our lives.

Will it be successful at first? Not necessarily.

Will we succeed ultimately? Absolutely.

What we need here is, to be able to see, we are not meant to suffer, we never were. We need to be able to see, we were never meant to hurt each other or abandon in need.

Everyone deserves to be happy and live a joyous life.

We need to find our original mindset for that. Since the desire is in our heart, we are already at the second step.

The impulse of the original mind, which everyone possesses, is to abhor evil and exalt goodness.

So, what are we waiting for?

We were born to be good with such a great creativity for co-creation.

 

 

-Joshua Dragon-

Once I Was Able to Love

once
everything was lost
I’ve offered everything
now
the long forgotten
might return

was
I able to love
more than myself
seems
an obvious answer
am I honest

who
is sending the signs
I can pretend but I’m
blind
no-one knew it
just my heart

an inner stone
seemed to be alive
me
being in a sea
are you my destination
still

 

Joshua Dragon

I should give the comfort

I should give the comfort
comfort for the world
even if I struggle
even when it hurts

 

being lost in life
torn apart in sea
broken pieces flooding
scrambling help signal

 

who can hear the agony
we all share here on Earth
can we be real siblings
or just being lost as always

 

God is still waiting
when we stand united
having the bonds
everlasting unbroken

 

 

Joshua Dragon

Discovering What Has Been Lost

Discovering

after such a long time

which can be a day

or more by thousand times

 

What has been lost

the Truth inside me

covered in shock

rage and hatred

 

New earthquake in my heart

needed to happen

dirt had piled up

time has come to shovel

 

I was dwelling in a frozen fragment of time

trying not to feel

although my eyes were open wide

I was hiding behind a veil

 

Just not to feel as much

not to be hurt again

not to hurt others

just be me in peace

 

Heaven called me early in my life

and I’ve made my promises

in exchange for my

and my children’s life

 

I had become broken

it’s hard to admit it

for someone

who always wants to fix it

 

Though, I had never stopped

I wasn’t full

I had become a broken wheel

hard to move

 

Only for others

not to care for myself

that was the only way

I was able to accept

 

Now I have to love

myself again

this way to be healed

and be able to heal

 

Discovering

what has been lost

reinventing

to reach even more

 

 

-Joshua Dragon-

 

What if you are not “fancy” enough?

Has it ever happened to you that you started to develop an unusual feeling of being neglected by your friends all of a sudden?

When you check your calls and it is plain obvious, although you’ve made the calls, and you haven’t really received any or too many, especially from those who matter to you and up until that you thought you matter to them, too?

Do you remember for the excuses when you tried to explain to yourself why and how probably, possibly, surely, definitely they just hadn’t had the time, again but you are still important to them?

Well, I’m sure, you also remember the moment of truth, admitting these are only excuses to avoid and accept the realization, this relationship, friendship, connection is not as meaningful and valuable for them as for you. That’s a painful one, always. And somehow, it doesn’t want to go away…

Of course, if you walk the path to help and guide people for the greater good, towards God, our Heavenly Parent, than you can have an extended viewpoint on this and it can provide some comfort -. with the understanding, God has been lonely, too, however, you are building Heaven if you keep the good and right attitude…

After so many years, there is one truth which reoccurs all the time for me: we do matter, ceaselessly to our Heavenly Father, our Parent, God. For Him it is not an extended relationship, a correspondence course, it is His bone marrow and we are in it whenever we walk the path of light, truth, care and active love. Interestingly enough, for Him it is less important how successful or great we are. For Him our heart, our mindset, our soul matter, this way He can heal our wounds and body and can share the abundant joy.

Have you ever thought how great you are?

You are unique. Nobody has ever existed anything like you before and will never be. Just you can be you and that makes you special.

Of course, to live up, to grow and mature to reach our full potential is a path with ups and downs. Yet, we are never alone.

You are never alone.

 

God has been calling you, all the time…

 

 

Joshua Dragon