Lights are passing by. A city of emptiness shines in the dark of humanity, hiding the vanity of selfish desires and purposeless lives. There is no face in the window I’m looking through. Ahead the mirrors, facing towards each other, reflecting the endless in mighty blur. Numbers sign the seats, some are empty, most are full, which is my number? Am I labelled again? Or still I just don’t know who am I? For long, I had known myself as an alien, a definite extra-terrestrial, an abandoned boy, a body burdened being, a mixture of man and women, a part of God, embodiment all the desires and falsity of all the others’ hopes. Who am I? I was asked, again tonight. I am asked, right now, it is me or someone who claims to be a true self of mine, who am I?
Seeking the holy, seeking the grail, the abundant and the vain, I’ve been in so many places, yet, have I stepped at all to the right direction?
Master of words, lyrics, composer of soul, artist of all, still immature, or a disciple of the real ancestors? Sometimes I feel yes, sometimes I fell, yes. What is true more? I must have been reborn, maybe a couple of times, there are lives I remember, like a vision, like a movie been seen long while ago, memories of things I don’t own.
I’ve never known my hometown. The address of my heart was never scribed, not then, maybe nowadays. As I see the world around, as I can see more and more, understand, feel, sense, as my tongue licks the salt of the life from the skin of abundant grace, the sweetness of the fractal of joy, I turn to be self-aware, a cognitive, sensitive… who? Am I really the ancestor of my descendants? Will they really inherit any blessings from my great deeds, great ones in the eyes of the Absolute God? Am I really the son of my Father?
I could say yes, I now the value of my good deeds, or at least I suppose, although, were there enough? Could I have done more, better, faster? Sure. There is no doubt in the amount of wasted opportunities and times, as I was living other lives, I’d rather change everything back, different, wiser, heartistic… but I can’t. It goes one way, I only can evaluate and promise even I couldn’t fully trust in myself in those other lives… I am here now. I can be a living offering; I can be myself as a newly born, grown, mature, existing, breathing real being. I can do it, actually, I know it.
Should be faster, better, more mature and a true reflection of the core of God’s Heart. Sounds exaggerating, it isn’t. All of us can do, each and every one of us. Even you and me, all of us. Though we were born in the land of abandoned true love, we can come to life, together, holding each other’s hands, embracing the fallen, uplifting the grieving, comforting the miserable, voluntarily giving, loving, sacrificing, even going to the bottom of the hell to change a place, liberating and living again, maybe first time ever in the history of humanity.
As God, our Heavenly Parent is eternal, unchanging, we must be like Him. Our stubborn will must be to inherit his long-cherished wish, and to manifest it. So we can be the true sons and daughters, the real ancestors of our descendants, so they can listen to our stories on and on, and for thousands of years this will be the eternal gospel, the gospel of love and true, filial heart and character.
Who am I, I’m not always sure, who I want to be, it is clear, again.
Looking at the mirrors ahead, I can see the brightness of heart and ideal life in an ideal world. A vision, can be manifested, by us, by me, too. Mirror of Nowhere is a place to create as the ideal to call hometown, homeland.
We all will return where we originally should have been from.
Be Blessed and Be Blessings to Others!